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August 17th, 2004
02:00 pm - A quick rant
Dealing with 'others' makes me want to scream sometimes, and I do silently to myself. It is a wonderful release :) Wading through thier emotional retoric and cleverly constructed shells of 'reality' where real feeling is overshadowed by the mind games they play with themselves, makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time. The gods of destruction are powerless in comparison to the limitless ways in which we destroy ourselves. Thier hollow insides that they claim others do not or cannot understand are shown to be transparent windows with views of nothing but their own failed imagination when brought out into the light. The door is shut with a loud crack on openess as it pitifully cries out to be touched by something other than their cold clammy hands which have been devoid of the warmth of real Love for so long they would break upon contact. Even those 'fortunate' few who do not watch the physical TV still watch the TV of their minds with a trancelike facination that they are somehow more aware than those who do. But this is the eternal delusion that psychologists in padded cells sell to the masses of drugged out intellectuals and psuedo-intellectuals, mystics and lonely people. You think you know me, you don't even know yourself, so THINK again, and again, and again, and see your reflection in my eyes.
Just felt like saying that, thank you for your time :)
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July 20th, 2004
12:28 pm - linguistic fires
We are gods, blinded by our own light, creating new infinities in the darkness.
As the new sun rises, we have only sunglasses to protect our crimson eyes from the light of a new day.
Silence falls asleep once more in the broken cradle of Life as the distance between feeling and meaning hides openly within the submodalities of physical space.
Words weep to themselves in a quite song of heartbreak, longing for love.
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July 14th, 2004
06:17 pm - a flowing of words
When is a pointer of time, and acceptance of linear time. Everything is. Thought and form condense into language creating words in the mind. Being is focused everywhere and nowhere by this sentence. Here is the ordered form of nowhere. Heartbeats don't really sing, or do they? If so, then the sky is falling. Words are thoughts in physical space. Freedom flows. When meanings are allowed, time is present. In and out play hide and go seek with each other. My consciousness is your consciousness. Sentences are connected by words in the ocean of Mind and disconnected by meaningful disconnection. Mind is a frequency of consciousness in human form. Mind is the choreographer of thought. Nothing is beyond space, unless there is space for it. Life isn't here. Your consciousness is my consciousness separated by words. Words are crawling all over my Body.
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July 3rd, 2004
05:55 pm
oh way oh way oh way out there
can you see me, as I sit and stare?
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June 18th, 2004
08:13 pm - The map is the territory
The idea of the map is not the territory sprung from Phenomenology, in which senses and sybology could only approximate and interpret underlying truth. Moving us further into our minds :) with technology working to keep up and allow sensory experience to equate the individual differences in perception and interpretation. Realism was born thru this, allowing a more 'correct' objective format of experience and judgement. Making it seem all the while that we are progressing in some 'real' sense, when actually we only went further into the mind, and lost more ability to feel our own experiences, living happily in a virtual reality. We just accept the perceptions we are programmed to. In going from recording to rendering, we now objectively share even our imagination in detail, yet lack an ability to imagine to any great extent, unless stimulated by an objective expression.
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May 17th, 2004
09:14 am - Love your creation
In the end, all explorations have their own meaning and purpose, whether one is conscious or not of the experience. Feeling the depths of infinity in any experience from the emptiness of transcendental meditation, to the economous feeling of sensations from vipassana, to space, time, gurus, trees, or a can of Coke, will allow other aspects of Being to come into consciousness. And often, as is expressed in some mystical systems, if you consciusly focus energy on certain aspects, such as psychic abilities, or writing a book, you can do cool things, even if at the same time, you may forget the cool things in every moment :) Self creation is the highest art.
Reality is a playground in which our sand castles become real when seen with the eyes of a child. Though many people have become simple adults, who bump into walls wherever they go, and yet feel they are above the children they see who amuse and anoy them. For they must keep themselves above the children, lest they look them in the eyes, and see reflections of their own infinity.
This has been a loose flowing of thoughts and words, if this had been a real essay, you would have seen a more rationaly organized format accross your screen. We now return you to your regularly scheduled program :)
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May 13th, 2004
03:20 pm - meaningful blurb
It is interesting how we create meaning, which then become unconscious, directing our perception automatically in one way or another.. like certain sounds, feelings of pain, words, images, etc.. to hear someone scream usually catches our attention, but the soft hum of the computer or wind not as much. Or if we hear something too much it loses meaning and blends into the background of our perception. TV uses meaning creation very efficiently, reinforcing it over and over again :)
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May 11th, 2004
12:11 am - Something I wrote
The vibrancy and brilliance of experience excites
me. With each conscious breath I take, the universe
flows through me, becoming an ocean, daring me to jump
in head first and die the little death. Every object
around me, transparent, existing by a thread. This is
my reality, what I have accepted unto my self. As I
stare at myself from inside, I know completely that I
can make the choice, unbound by time or space or what
others think, to be free. But instead, I just close
my eyes once again, and see the familiar visions of
daily life moving around me in the symbolic tapestry
of dimmed light. I find my comfort zone again, and
turn on the TV. The news is on again, that collective
virus that we all know and love. What's the focus for
today, let's see. Oh my, is the new movie about the
last moments of christ anti-semetic? Did the Jews
kill christ? Could it be? No, the Nazis will not
find another sacrifice to their scapegoat here, for
the great, and famous director, says that We killed
him, all of us.
We killed him alright, but he didn't die on a cross,
he died in a book, and we died with him. We suffer,
because we like to suffer, in fact, it's the only
thing we really love, with all our denied hearts. If
you doubt this, just look at the world we live in, the
government, the people, the education system, society,
or even yourself. We can blame whomever we want,
everyone does, but it all comes back to us. Because
we love it! That's the only answer.
Words are amazing things, they can hypnotise us,
empower us, destroy us, create us, and make us forget
about the rest of reality. I can be anywhere I want
to be, in an instant.
I'm sitting at the coffee shop again, observing the
'others' who are moving around in my experiential
space. Some of them are there for my benefit, and
some are just there to change the energy of my space.
Either way I try to enjoy the show, I am the producer
after all.
People are trying not to look at me, losing
themselves in their studies and other trendy patterns
of experience. Am I strange, or do they just not
realize that we are communicating, ever so boldly,
just beneath the surface. People like to play games,
if only they knew. Trouble is, they keep playing the
same games over and over again. It gets boring after
awhile. Sometimes I just feel like getting up and
smacking someone. Wake up damn you! But then, I
would be smacking myself, wouldn't I? Do I deserve
that?
The future lawyers and doctors of the world are
here, programing themselves with the appropriate
collective software they'll need to be part of the
great machine. I love the machine, for where else can
you find such a wonderful example of the potential of
the mind, without a body. Uh oh, someone's coming,
switching to dialog mode.
"Hello" said Sam. "Hey there" I said. "What are you
working on?" said Sam. "Nothing much, just writing
about my experiences and thoughts" I said. "Anything
interesting?" said Sam. "Always, if you keep your
eyes open" I said smiling. "Did you here about the
Spiritual event ther're having this Friday?" said Sam.
"Nope" I said. "Well it should be really good. This
world famous Shaman is going to be speaking on the
upper and lower planes of reality, and guide us on a
transformational journey" said Sam. I didn't have the
heart to tell him that we were having a Spiritual
event at that very moment, because he was focused
somewhere else, and seemed to be happy about it.
"Well, I'll see if I can go. I may have to work
though. I'll check it out and let you know though." I
said. "Ok, well hope to see you there. See ya later"
said Sam. "Bye, and have a wonderful day" I said as
he left.
Sam is a friend, or at least that was the category
of relationship he fit into. Still searching for the
answers to whatever he thinks the question is. The
old question and answer game is a hot ticket for the
intellectual well to do of society. Pick your poison,
philosophy, spirituality, science, it's all fair game.
Current Mood: creative
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May 10th, 2004
10:47 pm - More words!
Some quotes:
“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.” – Salvador Dali
"Everything that can be invented has been invented."
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899
In our culture the mind has inadvertently become the
driver at the wheel; it has become separate from its
source and has made itself independent. But the mind
is never really the controlling force; the mind is
just a mechanism that allows manipulation, creation
and communication. The controlling force is always the
whole being.
-Julian Palmer
If you know how to do one thing well,
you can do everything.
-- Gurdjeiff
"There is no more detestable creature in nature, than
a man who runs away from his demon"
- Joseph Conrad (The heart of darkness)
"I cant understand why people are frightened of new ideas. Im frightened of the old ones. -John Cage"
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May 8th, 2004
04:52 pm - words!
We the people, of the collective consciousness of humanity, generally write down our thoughts in this electronic aether of visual/linguistic forms, with the general accepted experience and understanding that the thoughts we express, are somehow separate from their medium of expression, words. This is no more true than the idea that in thinking about something, the thought and object of the thought are separate. How can you think about anything, unless you first perceive the object to think about in such a way that it has meaning? We almost never think about the space between our feet, which changes constantly as we move around in physical space. Are there really any separations between our thoughts at all? Thoughts are things..so they say. Perception is made up of the thoughts we draw to ourselves is it not? So somewhere, in my unconscoiusness, as I write these words, I am creating or thinking the thoughts that make this experience possible, that give meaning through perception to this focus of physical energy I experience as a typing of words on my computer. And further, upon this foundation of experiencing, I write the specific words in such a way that, in my belief, others will be able to read and find meaning as well, thus creating a communication of beings, experienced through the act of reading/thinking.
It's just so damn cool! So I could say, your a fucking idiot, and someone reading this would get meaning from these words, which would then trigger a response like, No, your the fucking idiot! They would then most likely separate the words and their meaning from his or her self, and project them to the writer, myself, creating an experience that fully absolves them from any responsibility of their reaction to those words, because the guy who said them was the real fucking idiot :)
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